Andrew Leigh

Wonderous Times With Newborns, The Chronicle, 6 November 2012

Ever wondered why a calf can walk after a few hours, while a baby takes a year to learn the same skill? It turns out that the problem arises from two features of humans – we stand on two legs (which requires a small and bony pelvis), but also have large brains (which are hard to fit through that pelvis). Evolution’s solution to this problem is that all humans are born – in a sense – prematurely. After emerging from the womb, we need more protection from the world than do most other animals.

I’m typing this article one-handed, with a one month old boy asleep in the crook of my left arm. There’s something extraordinary about new life – its beautiful vulnerability and that unique ‘new baby smell’ that disappears all too quickly. Zachary is our third child, and we’ve gotten a few things right this time that we wish we’d done before.

First, when the baby arrived, we politely asked friends who thought of sending flowers to please instead make a donation to the charity ‘Send Hope – Not Flowers’. The charity was established by three young Canberrans - obstetrician Steve Robson, journalist Emma Macdonald and internet entrepreneur Alex Fahey - along with Sydney writer Julie Ulbricht. For the cost of a bunch of flowers, you can save the life of a mother in the developing world. The charity works with partner organisations in Papua New Guinea, Indonesia and the Solomon Islands, and donations can be made through their website: www.sendhope.org.

Second, I’ve really been relishing taking a bit of extra dad time with the children. A new baby is both exciting and unsettling for siblings. So the chance to kick a football or read a book with the two older boys has given them a bit of stability at what would otherwise be a chaotic time. Paternity leave isn’t so easy in my job, since no-one else becomes the Member for Fraser when I’m not at the office. But community organisations have been wonderfully understanding when I’ve told them I can’t attend an evening event because of the munchkins. Indeed, Zachary arrived only a few months before the commencement on 1 January 2013 of ‘Dad and Partner Pay’. The program will give eligible fathers and partners two weeks’ leave at the minimum wage (currently $606 a week).

Third, my wife and I are realising that the right answer when anyone offers help is ‘yes’. Family and friends are invaluable at a time like this, and we’ve been lucky to have a strong network of people around us. Some of our friends came through Gweneth’s mother’s group. These groups are coordinated by ACT Playgroups, which will celebrate its 40^th anniversary next year. If you’re a new parent, I can’t recommend them highly enough.

But while we’ve learned a thing or two over the past five years, we’re still bumbling our way along – trying to work out the best way to raise our kids. It’s fun, it’s daunting, and it’s exhausting. It’s parenthood.

Andrew Leigh is the federal member for Fraser.